Of Catchers and Butterflies

"... I didn't care though ... I felt so damn happy, 
if you want to know the truth. I don't know why..."
- The Catcher in the Rye, p213

"It's called the butterfly effect. 
You step on a few butterflies, 
and some time later, people die."
- Angela Petrelli (in Heroes)

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You see, there is a problem with this situation. We think we are going in the right decision. We think we are masters of ourselves. How so? Is there such thing as "Free Will?" What have I done over the years?

Look, here is me, a person that devotes to knowledge, math, and computers. A person that participates in no sports team because of not competent enough, which is due to lack of perseverance. A person that is socially inclined. Outcast. Defend vehemently against the superficial. A person, not even participating in any community service. What have I done?

There is always people around you that at least attempt to push you, help you, but I am just too ignorant to realize that fact. Is it planned? Am I destined this way anyways? Is it that I have just not enough free will to shape my day? There must be a reason why so many people are ignorant, moving on with life without knowing what lies ahead. There must be a reason why I stand here today. Rationality. Pursue of knowledge. The right path or the pitfall? For the very least there is something missing.

Why am I alone, feeling need of companionship? For these years why never has anything come? Some do come close, then go away. I rely on myself. Is myself reliable? Am I stepping on too many butterflies that I don't even know of?

Why so many people have a niche in sports? Community service? Clubs? Why not me? People stand up to do stuff. I should stand up as well. Problem is I don't have the ability. Is it truely too late? Me, 15 years old, too late? That's BS. Is this the problem? That I delve too much into my stuff that I alienated other important aspects and ability? That the achievements of other people in these area are slowly corroding away my fortress in this world? That I begin to shrink in importance and the fundamental layer I hold has begun to be attacked? If so then I need defense. I need to fight back. NOW.

There is still time.

再見了阿扁

「陳水扁、吳淑珍被判無期徒刑、褫奪公權終身，加起來的罰金高達五億元。 扁家4大案11日一審宣判，前總統陳水扁集六罪於一身重判無期徒刑，併科罰金2億元，禠奪公權終身」

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悲哀阿

別人 ( 國民黨上下 ) 拿那麼多錢沒事

不代表你只拿一點不會有事 !

你可是民進黨的阿

公權力在的時候國民黨不敢查

是因為你可以去挖他們的骷髏頭

用各種以前的種種案件抓他們

現在在國民黨開的法院裡面

你可不受保護阿

 

當然並不是完全都是扁的錯

很多時候錢是非得要拿得

三個人去殺人

你是最後一個拿刀的

你可以自命清高不跟著捅一刀嗎

你如果那樣的話，其他人絕對讓你不好過 !

貪污也是一樣阿

你如果不拿一點的話

人家會想盡辦法讓你不好過阿

人家都拿那麼多，改天被你抓怎麼辦 !



國民黨很聰明

控制了一堆媒體煽動人民

騙取選票

利用各種方法掩蓋馬英九的不是

告陳水扁告那麼久所以人家不會注意到馬的無能

想辦法高鐵、高捷雞蛋裡挑骨頭

弄黑民進黨

誰知道年輕的一代不懂歷史

不懂得以前各式各樣種種案件

全都被騙了 !



想想看

扁被判無期徒刑

還被罰那麼多錢

難道只是單純的法院審判嗎

難道不是因為國民黨自有的 agenda ?



民進黨趕快回來阿

台灣不能給國民黨做阿

台灣、中國是一邊一國 !

Objectivity, Subjectivity

For far too many issues in the world, there is considerable opinion and subjectivity involved. In these topics, every article, every speech, every book, no matter how objective it appears to be, is vulnerable to subjectivity. Because either side of the argument has substantial stance, the general public is susceptible to being easily swayed to frantically supporting a cause that is actually not substantiated as well as the opposite cause.

I am no different. This is like a modified version of a tug-o-war representing your opinion on the spectrum. Basically in the beginning, the first person to pull the rope (ie the first article/influence on the topic) pulls it the farthest. Then, as more and more people joins the war (ie as you read more, hear more - especially on both sides), the situation stabilizes. However, there is rarely a neutral position, not because necessarily one side is better (although that could be the case), but because summing up the knowledge acquired so far, the argument is more weighted towards one side - and this is also heavily skewed about the reading sequence.

For far too many times I surrendered to a compelling argument because of lack of knowledge to rebut. However, I do absolutely nothing to remedy or to learn save from admitting lost; in fact the reluctance to change (inertia) is so strong that I am standing on pretty much the same side as I did since I first hear about the issue unless glaringly bad holes surfaces. The problem is that I do not learn and read more; I simply do nothing about it and let it slip by.

It is not true that I do not read; in fact I do read - a lot. I am basically consumed in the thirst of knowledge that I cannot pull myself out of. This seems strange as most people cares lots more about other things - and yet my analytical skills are not better? I do believe that one should stand on a position - and firm - after extensive ongoing research because if one continues to be neutral (or really: oblivious) then one can never make a decision in life.

Why is there such a confusion? Why is there such uncertainty? Maybe I am keeping all this inside my head for far too long? I can satisfy my thirst for knowledge and understanding the world, but that would not be enough since I would spend all my time pondering around the fragments of memory and constantly skewing information. There is a need for other people. First step is understanding, second step is discussing - by pulling on more brain powers to collaboratively analyze the issue. I sincerely hope to understand the world more and be happier. Ignorance is not bliss because ignorance is impractical.

加拿大 - 有蚊子 !

繼承去年去山上小溪 ( Cowichan River) 划船 ( 小黑蚊 60+ 包 )
今年回花蓮快健 ( 小黑蚊 60 + 包 )

現在的學校

草原上怎麼有那麼多「大」蚊子阿
才不到一個小時
就被叮了 10 包了 > <

原來，加拿大那麼都市的地方也是有成群結隊的蚊子 !